Succeeding with Asian women—and succeeding in life, really — is all about expanding your “comfort zone.”
If you currently are not dating and having sex on a regular basis with attractive women, then it’s time for you to make some changes.
Here’s a solid piece of advice to start with:
Get To Know The “Gate Keepers.”
It’s very important for you to start building “gate keeper” relationships. This means making AAF’s (Asian Female Friends) who will then give you access to more Asian women. You probably won’t be having sex with any of these AAFs. Their function will be to introduce you to their cute friends and get you into their social circles.
When Asian women go out, they tend to hang together in groups, and it can be extremely hard to “penetrate” the group and introduce yourself when you don’t know any of them. The best possible way to meet a beautiful Asian girl is to be introduced to her by one of her friends who knows you (and “vouches” for you as a good guy).
Many times I’ve been in nightclubs in California or Las Vegas and I see a group of Asian girls I’d love to be with. Some of them are very cute, but usually there are one or two girls in the group who are short, chubby and unattractive. Those are the girls that it’s easy to make friends with. Then, the next time they all go out to the club or to a party, guess what? You’ll be invited to come along, and you can get to know all of them in a way that feels comfortable and natural for everyone. The “gate keeper” will go out of her way to make sure you are enjoying yourself and meeting all of her friends.
Asian women are really cool in this way. I’ve known plain-looking divorced Asian women in their 40s who I never slept with (and didn’t want to), but because I was friendly and charming towards them, they bent over backwards to fix me up with their cute, younger single friends!
I have met awesome “gate keepers” at my work. These women are starved for attention from men, so they’re happy to make friends with me. In a lot of cases, as soon as I mention that I’m single, the woman will start offering to introduce me to her single Asian friends who are looking for boyfriends! (Like I said, Asian women love to play “match maker” and hook up their friends with nice guys—especially a nice foreign guy.)
The next thing you know, you might get invited to a birthday party where you’re surrounded by 20 Asian women and you’re the only foreigner—so of course, they’re all curious to meet you, and your gate keeper friend is introducing you to everyone.
You can meet these “gate keepers” anywhere—it could be your neighbor, a woman at your job, from your church, a class you are taking, etc.
So, building your network of casual Asian female friends is the first step. When you’re ready to take it to the next level, you can become the organizer of social activities. Host a dinner party and tell your gate keepers to bring some single friends to meet you and your friends.
Plan a picnic or barbeque at the beach. This way, you’re taking the responsibility off of the gate keeper (these women are normally putting themselves in charge of organizing activities for their social groups), and you are offering to plan a fun occasion for her and her friends. They’ll be thrilled when you extend this type of initiation.
Know How To Read The Signals.
For a lot of years I just didn’t “get it.” I missed out on so many opportunities to bang Asian women because I didn’t “take the hint” and recognize that these women wanted to sleep with me! I thought they were just being friendly, and I didn’t want to risk making a move and getting rejected. Knowing how to read the “attraction signals” of Asian women will save you a lot of regret later on.
Once you start making more Asian female friends and spending time hanging out with them, you will notice the slight verbal and nonverbal “cues” that they use to communicate their interest in you.
In the past, I’d have AFF’s say things to me like, “So what are you doing this weekend?” “Can you help me with my homework?” “I’m so stressed out, let’s go drinking.” Or they’d give me compliments like “Wow, do you work out?” Or, “you’re so smart.” I thought they were just being friendly. I didn’t realize that Asian women typically won’t say these kinds of things, due to their shyness. The fact that they were saying these things, and extending invitations to, really meant one thing: they wanted to fuck me.
When I was in graduate school, I had cute classmates from Japan, China, Singapore, Taiwan and Thailand come to my crappy little on-campus apartment to study with me. I thought they just wanted to study; I didn’t want to creep them out by trying something sexual. But now I realize that they were totally up for sex. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have been hanging out at my apartment until midnight. It was an unusually aggressive move for an Asian woman to invite herself to my place to “study” at night. But I didn’t read the signal— so we would study, and she would go home. If only I’d read the signals and “escalated” with these girls (read the “Secrets Of Dating Asian Women” book for more information on this process).
She might make the first move by inviting herself over, but the next move is always going to be up to you. If you don’t escalate, nothing sexual is going to happen.
Now I realize that when a female Asian co-worker or “friend” asks me to come over and see her house, because she wants to get my opinion on whether she should sell it, renovate it, or whatever, I read the signals and I know what this “invitation” is really about. I always show up with a small “house warming” gift, and within minutes of me walking in the door she is practically tearing my clothes off.
Follow up on all hints of interest in a polite and focused manner. If she says “you should come see my house sometime,” don’t just say “yeah, OK, let me know when you want me to come by.” Tell her you can come by on Saturday or Sunday, and ask her which is better for her. Make a plan. Don’t blow your chance.
Love them and they will love you back with great intensity.
I’ve noticed that Asian men tend to treat their women rather poorly compared to how we treat women as Westerners. (Honestly, a lot of Western guys go overboard when they like a girl…kissing her ass, spending money on her, trying to rush her into committing to a serious relationship, etc. I always respect women and treat them like a gentleman, but you never want to act like a spineless chump who feels lucky to be with her.)
If an Asian woman is extremely beautiful by the standards of her society, then of course guys are going to kiss her ass and treat her like a princess. But that’s only 1% or 2% of Asian women. The rest are often severely lacking in self-confidence. If she’s past her mid-twenties and still single, she may be afraid that she’ll never find a man. Where she comes from, women are held to an extremely high standard.
If she’s been married before, or already has a kid, most Asian guys wouldn’t even consider dating her. If she’s older than 26, she’s also
considered to be “past her expiration date.” And the standards of beauty where she comes from are incredibly high: you’ve got to be tall, graceful, have flawless skin, and be from a good family. This is why most Asian women are self-conscious about their looks and don’t consider themselves to be special or unique.
The point is, by loving the Asian woman that you are with at the moment and giving her your complete attention, you will make her feel extremely special. This means keep your cell phone turned off, hold her hand in a proud way when you walk with her, pay for everything, be polite and respectful, and tell her the little things about her that you find cute or sexy. (Her laugh, her smile, her hair, the way she walks, etc.)
When she says negative things about herself, don’t allow it. Communicate to her that she is totally unique and special to you. Take her out to do fun things—go on weekend trips, romantic “date nights,” sports games, etc. When you share your fun experiences with her, this will make her feel bonded to you.